Oh, Michael Keaton! We know how much you love Batman. And we're truly sorry you never got to portray Bruce Wayne in another Tim Burton sequel. But is the Dark Knight really the best superhero ever? That's what the Birdman actor is claiming. But it all might just be a ruse to get journalists to stop asking him about the character, which he last played 23 years ago in 1992's Batman Returns.

Michael Keaton was nominated for his role as a washed-up superhero actor in last year's Birdman. And it's obvious that he has a lot of affinity for the genre. But one thing he can't stand seeing is a superhero cry. Visiting The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon, he regaled the host with a story about how he went to the store got get his iPhone fixed. The clerk helping him was transfixed by The Amazing Spider-Man 2, which was playing on one of the monitors in the repair shop. Keaton soon realized that the guy behind the counter was way more interested in watching Andrew Garfield's Peter Parker try to save Emma Stone's Gwen Stacy in the climactic battle that comes at the end of the sequel than helping him with his phone. After Gwen falls to her death, Peter arrives on the scene, tears streaming down his cheeks. Michael Keaton turned to the clerk and had this to say.

"This is Spider-Man? Is he crying? P*ssy. Batman would never cry."

That story is pretty funny, but you'll want to hear Michael Keaton tell it himself in the clip we've included below. The actor is currently making the press rounds in support of his latest drama Spotlight. While that movie focuses on some serious issues as it follows a group of journalists uncovering the Catholic Priest pedophile scandal, Keaton can't escape the inevidtale superhero questions. Speaking with ABC News Radio, he was asked whether the Hulk could beat Batman in a fight. The question seemed pertinent at the time, as Michael Keaton was being interviewed alongside his Spotlight co-star Mark Ruffalo. That didn't stop the former caped crusader from offering this definitive answer.

"Everyone needs to stop asking the question of who could beat up who. Batman kicks everybody's ass. And if they won't, I will, Bruce Wayne will.

Of course this is crazy talk. There is no way Bruce Wayne beats Hulk in a fair fight, right? It's unclear if the millionaire even owns a piece of hardware that can stand up to the green goliath in the same fashion as the Hulk Buster. But these kinds of questions all come in good fun. It just sounds like Michael Keaton is tired of answering them. With Hulk belonging to Marvel and Batman housed at DC, we surely won't see these two iconic characters fight on the big screen any time soon.

But wait, what does Mark Ruffalo think of this response? We don't know yet, as he hasn't answered back. The Hulk will next be seen in the 2017 sequel Thor: Ragnarok, while the Dark Knight will hit the screen opposite the Man of Steel in this spring's Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice. It should be noted that Batman did beat the Hulk in a 1981 crossover comic book. And he did it with a simple gas grenade. While Bruce Banner's alter ego was Hulking out inside Wayne Industries, Bruce threw the grenade at Hulk's head, then kicked him in the solar plexus, causing him to suck up all the gas. This knocked the green giant out instantly. So we guess Michael Keaton is right! Take a look at his interview with the always partying Jimmy Fallon!