“Hey, Could'a Happened!”
“I'm So Glad Tom Hardy And Joaquin Phoenix Turned This Down...”
“Lincoln Is The Million Dollar Man”
“So Horrible Its Fantastic”
“Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter Sells Itself As A Campy Fun Horror Movie, But It Plays Itself Too Seriously To Be Campy Fun.”
“While You Should Not Have High Expectations For The Film, And Is By No Means A Best Picture Contender. With Good Direction, Passable Acting And Outstanding Visuals. ALVH Is An Entertaining, Dumb & Goofy Romp That Never Takes Itself To Seriously. Good Fun”
“Slow, Boring, Un-stylistically Posed. Its Something You Find Under Your Foot, You Humour It Then Feel Repulsed By It. (Short Review Based On Walking Out)*”
“This Is Me Taking Control.. From Barts, From The Court, From Vampires, Death Reports, Stupid Black Ink, From Slavery And Sack Of Crap Traitors! This Is Me Taking Back Control Of My Life... What In The Politics Have You Done Lately?”
“Revisionist Fantasy That Borders On The Absurd”
The movie plays safe by cutting every theme down the middle - a swing that's effective when splitting wood or vampire skulls, but dull when applied to filmmaking.
Lisa Schwarzbaum - Entertainment Weekly
"Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter" is such a smashing title it's too bad someone had to spoil things by making a movie to go with it.
Manohla Dargis - New York Times
Bekmambetov directs with gusto, and the forthright absurdity of the story, combined with its weirdly heartfelt self-belief is winning.
Peter Bradshaw - Guardian [UK]
Despite its factual dismemberment of the movie's namesake, Hunter bristles as summer action fodder. Honest.
Scott Bowles - USA Today
Both terribly silly and a lot of fun.
Michael O'Sullivan - Washington Post
It's a sin against entertainment.
Ty Burr - Boston Globe
Possible resulting "fun" is only slightly mitigated by contemplation of the wearisome decadence of American popular culture.
Nick Pinkerton - Village Voice
This insipid mashup of history lesson and monster flick takes itself semi-seriously, which is truly deadly.
Joe Neumaier - New York Daily News
Someone forgot to tell the filmmakers ... that the movie was supposed to be fun. Or at least smart.
Joe Morgenstern - Wall Street Journal
The disconnect between intention and final product is a head scratcher.
Ricardo Baca - Denver Post
It constitutes a moral sin, if not an outright moral crime, and commits a grave insult against history.
Glenn Kenny - MSN Movies
The violence quickly becomes numbing, and Benjamin Walker plays Lincoln without the sense of irony needed to keep the historical and supernatural sides of the story consistently entertaining.
Bruce Diones - New Yorker
A more entertaining movie than I remotely expected.
Roger Ebert - Chicago Sun-Times
It sounds fun. It's a little fun. For a while. But Bekmanbetov shoots every killing spree like an addled gamer, working that slow-down-speed-up kill-shot cliche like a maniac.
Michael Phillips - Chicago Tribune
Here is the worst thing to happen to Abe Lincoln in a theater since he attended "Our American Cousin."
Colin Covert - Minneapolis Star Tribune
What next, "George Washington Werewolf"? Laugh not, history profs.
Tom Long - Detroit News
The problem with movies based on a single joke is that a single joke is rarely funny enough to sustain the running time of a feature-length film. And with "Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter," the whole joke is in the title.
Barbara VanDenburgh - Arizona Republic
Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter is a Civil War-era actioner of questionable taste and historical accuracy but surprisingly consistent entertainment value.
Justin Chang - Variety
Don't let the stupid title dissuade you from seeing "Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter." Let the stupid plot, the stupid history, the stupid action scenes, the stupid trivializing of slavery . . .
Kyle Smith - New York Post
This film should be campy fun, but in Bekmambetov's unsteady hands, it feels laboured and unsatisfying.
Bruce Demara - Toronto Star
Bekmambetov doesn't expect us to take the premise seriously, exactly. But he doesn't seem to want us to laugh at it, either.
Eric D. Snider - Film.com
The trouble with the so-called high-concept film is that too often the concept is the best thing about it and the actual movie essentially a series of rather rote, progressively more tiresome variations on its premise.
James Adams - Globe and Mail
Bekmambetov ... stages hilarious, imaginative, almost free-form action sequences like nobody in the business.
Andrew O'Hehir - Salon.com
The concept of Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter is worthy of a good chuckle or two, but the execution proves that sometimes a clever title does not beget a production of equal value.
James Berardinelli - ReelViews
Genre enthusiasts will lap up the mixture of action and fantasy, while history buffs who don't mind a bit of rewriting will dig into an alternative spin on the Civil War period.
Justin Lowe - Hollywood Reporter
What ideally might have been playful and knowing is instead uptight and dreary, with a visual scheme that's so fake and cartoony, it depletes the film of any sense of danger.
Christy Lemire - Associated Press
The historical epic and the monster movie run on parallel tracks, occasionally colliding but never forming a coherent whole.
Richard Corliss - TIME Magazine
The acrobatic repetition bores you breathless. Spare Benjamin Walker, who deserves to go on to better things. But the movie deserves a stake through the heart.
Peter Travers - Rolling Stone
Of course it's ridiculous and tasteless and grotesque. It's ABRAHAM LINCOLN, VAMPIRE HUNTER.
Richard Roeper - Richard Roeper.com
Given the subject matter, an exercise in delicacy and restraint was unlikely, but it's too bad that the film's concept is way more entertaining than what has ended up on-screen.
Kenneth Turan - Los Angeles Times
If you thought the American Civil War was about ending slavery, you're in for a rude surprise.
Tom Glasson - Concrete Playground
Succeeds in being an entertaining, exciting, and chilling genre hybrid
Felix Vasquez Jr. - Cinema Crazed
A rancid hot pot of over-caffeinated action, choppy editing, self-importance and retarded scripting, Lincoln is the worst blockbuster in recent memory...
Adam Ross - The Aristocrat
As a tongue-in-cheek action mashup, Grahame-Smith and Bekmambetov have, for the most part, delivered an entertaining (albeit campy) historical retelling.
Ben Kendrick - ScreenRant
Frankly, if it gets kids talking about history again, Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter succeeds where a lot of other films stumble-and even if it's kind of a lame duck, there's still a lot of dignity in that.
Patrick Kolan - Shotgun Critic
What you get with "Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter" is an interesting concept that has a number of structural problems.
Jeff Beck - Examiner.com
Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter doesn't even come close to living up to the fun, silly nature of its premise. The film is a dull, humorless, ugly-looking slog.
Jonathan Lack - We Got This Covered
With the most preposterous of plots, one would expect "Lincoln" to be funny, but it's not. It takes itself as seriously as a disease, and therein lies the biggest problem with this film.
Justin Craig - FoxNews.com
completely ludicrous but fun.
James Luxford - The National
While the film eventually feels a little exhausting, particularly in the protracted but impressive finale, it works as well as this material possibly could.
William Bibbiani - CraveOnline
Bekmambetov knows his way around supernatural movies very well but he just doesn't seem to have the sense of humour needed for this one.
Tim Martain - The Mercury
The most important thing about enjoyably trashy, title-says-it-all action films such as Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter is to keep everything moving so fast and on such a huge scale that nobody will care too much about how monumentally silly it all is.
Jim Schembri - 3AW
If The Matrix turned the humble spoon into an enduring visual motif for the cinematic dinner table, Vampire Hunter attempts to do the same with a fork.
Luke Buckmaster - Crikey
AL:VH is easy to dismiss and equally as easy to forget, but it does what it does well.
Matt Neal - The Standard
Uses cues from the life of the former US President and builds an unwieldy supernatural story on top of it.
Cameron Williams - The Popcorn Junkie
Sounds like it was pitched at the tail-end of a particularly cynical, three-day, coke-fuelled marketing strategy session in between Transformers with Boobs and The Voice: The Movie...
Simon Miraudo - Quickflix
Whatever clever literary concepts screenwriter Seth Grahame-Smith has adapted from his novel, has been well and truly stomped
Louise Keller - Urban Cinefile
What makes Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter so enjoyable is the extent it abandons so many established rules not just in terms of history and genre, but also physics.
Thomas Caldwell - Cinema Autopsy
There is just not enough substance to it. Lots of graphic, slo-mo blood spills, big battle scenes and gunfire, axe-wielding Abe chopping down the vampires, albeit often in a blur of action we can't really relish
Andrew L. Urban - Urban Cinefile
A funny, scary, and cheer-worthy adventure that somehow manages to make the 16th President of the United States a bad-ass action hero.
Rick Marshall - Movies.com