Conan the Barbarian Reviews

  • Here's a movie that's simultaneously lavishly violent and numbing, visually ornate and undistinguished, epic and shallow, relentlessly noisy and tone-deaf, workmanlike and unfilling.

    Lisa Schwarzbaum — Entertainment Weekly

  • Mr. Momoa has some awfully big biceps to fill. He rises to that task with a pumped physique made for ogling.

    Manohla Dargis — New York Times

  • Conan the Barbarian lives by a pretty simple ethos: He lives, he loves, he slays. What he doesn't do, alas, is act.

    Scott Bowles — USA Today

  • Momoa ... speaks in one of those trying-too-hard baritones heard in young jocks whose greatest fear is being called gay.

    John DeFore — Washington Post

  • Even the Schwarzenegger version had a crackpot long-range vision. This Conan is just a barbarian for hire.

    Ty Burr — Boston Globe

  • Both truer to the vision of its character's creator, Robert E. Howard, and more satisfyingly pulpy than the 1982 movie incarnation.

    Mark Holcomb — Village Voice

  • It's just another ham-handed adventure flick in eye-deadening, wallet-draining 3-D.

    Joe Neumaier — New York Daily News

  • Dull and uninvolving, Conan the Barbarian occasionally verges on escaping its rut, but never makes good on the promise. It's busy without having energy, a loud, lackluster mess.

    Gary Dowell — Dallas Morning News

  • A brutal, crude, witless high-tech CGI contrivance, in which no artificial technique has been overlooked, including 3-D.

    Roger Ebert — Chicago Sun-Times

  • I've certainly seen worse movies this summer, though I hope that if director Nispel returns to the land of Hyboria he'll learn that sword fights don't respond well to his chaotic brand of staging, made worse by the editing.

    Michael Phillips — Chicago Tribune

  • At its best the movie suggests a funhouse at a state-of-the-art county fair; at its worst it's a fairly dumb celebration of brute violence.

    Ben Sachs — Chicago Reader

  • There's just not a lot to like here, with the exception of what may be one of the all-time best bad movie lines, one Conan utters to Tamara as a kind of personal credo: "I live. I love. I slay. I am content." That makes one of us.

    Bill Goodykoontz — Arizona Republic

  • With all earnestness, Nispel embraces the property's classic roots, placing this new Conan squarely within the tradition of sword-and-sorcery pics.

    Peter Debruge — Variety

  • You can't underestimate the vitality of a movie where manly men give orders such as, "We will cast our rivals into oceans of blood."

    Kyle Smith — New York Post

  • The very definition of the dumb summer flick, designed to squeeze a few last bucks out of the kids before school starts up again.

    Linda Barnard — Toronto Star

  • Shoddy acting, no real plot, and silly dialogue? You betcha!

    Laremy Legel — Film.com

  • It ain't a pretty sight -- in fact, it's downright barbaric.

    Rick Groen — Globe and Mail

  • The 2011 version of Conan the Barbarian looks cheap and feels rushed. The few good elements are dwarfed by a generic, nonsensical plot and shoddy storytelling.

    James Berardinelli — ReelViews

  • Non-stop blood-and-guts action aimed at game boys and emotionally stunted lovers of adolescent fantasy.

    Kirk Honeycutt — Hollywood Reporter

  • It didn't seem possible for there to be even less characterization than there was in the original "Conan," but voila.

    Christy Lemire — Associated Press

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