“Why Did I Even Bother... Uhhhhhhhhhhhh.”
“When Spoofs Go Wrong”
“MASTERPIECE---IN SPOOFING, No, But Still Light Heart Fun”
“I Wish I Can This Piece Of Crap Movie A -0000 Stars!”
“"Film Is What They Title Says:Disaster!"”
“The Name Of This Movie Oddly Fits It Perfectly.”
“"And What A Disaster This Movie Is! Haven't The Movie Studios Learned Anything Yet?"”
“This Movie Sucked And Made No Sense!”
“FOUR WORD REVIEW!! REMOVE THE WORD MOVIE!!”
“Err..frozen Movie I Called It”
“This Is A Bloody Disaster”
“Better Film On Teeth”
“I'm Back B****es! Its Adam Janaway Your Favoroite Film Critic. ”
“"Disaster Movie" Reveiw By Corey "Carnage" Wood”
“Boring To Death And Just As Embarrassingly Bad...”
“I Guess They Werent Lying Wen Amy Whinehouse Sed The World Would End On August 29!”
“I BET THIS MOVIE WILL BE FUNY BUT THEN IT WILL BE STUPID IF U KNOW WHAT I MEAN JUST LIKE THE OTHER 1'S.BUT ITS WHATEVER.”
“Here We Go Again.”
Since many of the targets (Cloverfield, Hancock, Kung Fu Panda) already have a cheeky self-consciousness, the comedy rarely seems more than a hasty patchwork of cheap-shot allusions.
Owen Gleiberman - Entertainment Weekly
Disaster Movie, the latest disposable parody of disposable Hollywood movies, has a shelf life of about five minutes, tops.
Nathan Lee - New York Times
The Zucker/Abrahams movies were genuinely funny, at least some of the time. But this?
Peter Bradshaw - Guardian [UK]
No one spoofed in the film -- yes, including Jessica Simpson -- is more worthy of derision than the people responsible for making it.
Michael Hardy - Boston Globe
Rushed into production with no better drape for its threadbare gags than Cloverfield, this carpet-fouling mongrel of a movie no more deserves release than do anthrax spores.
Jim Ridley - Village Voice
Why would you watch a bad movie about better movies, when you could just rent the originals instead?
Elizabeth Weitzman - New York Daily News
Seldom has a pic been more appropriately titled than Disaster Movie, yet another frantically unfunny free-form farce from the unfortunately prolific writing-directing team of Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer.
Joe Leydon - Variety
Embarrassment. It's a feeling you should get used to, Freidberg and Seltzer. May you never befoul another cinema with your grotesque comic abortions.
Eric D. Snider - Film.com
No one expects sophisticated wit from this type of movie, but would it be too much to ask for more than a chuckle every 10 minutes?
Stephen Farber - Hollywood Reporter
Perhaps they'll eventually make one called Spoof Movie, which would brilliantly parody the genre by being consistently funny.
Michael Ordona - Los Angeles Times
Rarely has a movie had a more appropriate title.
Jeffrey Lyles - Lyles' Movie Files
Brent Simon - Shared Darkness
Andrea Gronvall - Time Out
It's a merry, reckless mess, like a blender that gets revved up too high and spews everything out all over the countertops.
Neil Pond - American Profile
Indeed a disaster first, and a movie barely.
William Goss - Cinematical
The "jokes" are limp and pathetic or stillborn, timing is ignored, performances are a not-so-giddy mug-fest. Audiences are left wondering when the freshman cast is going to learn the rudiments of performing.
Bruce Feld - Film Journal International
A dumb, dumb film, to be sure, but also undeniably funny in more spots than a right-thinking, mature adult person feels comfortable admitting.
Jim Schembri - The Age (Australia)
A woman a few rows in front of me at the preview chose to write 20 minutes worth of text messages, rather than watch the movie. Even though she was not paying, the price was clearly too high.
Paul Byrnes - Sydney Morning Herald
Since they have so little material to work with in the first place, Friedberg and Seltzer flog each joke well beyond its limits.
Vicky Roach - Daily Telegraph (Australia)
Honestly, if the makers of this ever got serious about making web-based comedy, I reckon that they would absolutely rock it.
Marc Fennell - Triple j
If Judd Apatow is the Jesus of modern comedy, Seltzer and Friedberg are the Anti-Christ - and sadly just as prolific
Garth Franklin - Dark Horizons
Can't somebody make Friedberg and Seltzer stop?
Jim Lane - Sacramento News & Review
leaves one with a feeling of failure -- and the knowledge that, come this spring, these idiots will more than likely be back
Bill Gibron - Filmcritic.com
Pointlessly rancid and redundant...Hopefully, Disaster Movie will indeed vanish as quickly as a three-second burp at a chili-eating contest.
Frank Ochieng - Movie Eye
Why challenge yourself when you can have your Juno stand-in end a fight by lactating on the "Sex and the City" girls? Nope, a better question is why did I subject myself to this movie?
Jeffrey Lyles - Gazette (MD)
Surely even bovine American teenagers have to realise their intelligence is being insulted sooner or later.
Mike McCahill - Daily Telegraph
Disaster Movie is not, as you might have guessed, a parody of disaster movies. But it is a disaster.
Chris Hewitt (St. Paul) - St. Paul Pioneer Press
It could be the first great mainstream art experiment. Or, perhaps, since the opening word of dialogue is "Shit!", the jokes are mostly about it, and the characters are regularly covered in it, it is more likely that the movie itself is just, well . . .
Kevin Maher - Times [UK]
It's not even value for money if you're a moron.
Christopher Tookey - Daily Mail [UK]
Like Hepatitis B, this is one of those movies you just hope will go away.
Tim Evans - Sky Movies
Anti-comedy. Anti-cinema. Anti-life.
Leigh Singer - Film4
I want to say thanks again and thanks for proving that dumb movies pretending to be comedy will not stand any longer...
Felix Vasquez Jr. - Cinema Crazed
Of Disaster Movie it is difficult to speak, or even think, articulately, a handicap that seems to have afflicted the film's makers.
Martin Hoyle - Financial Times
Not a comedy, more a medical affliction, Disaster Movie's symptoms include apathy, regret and eventual despair.
David Edwards - Daily Mirror [UK]
Disaster Movie is lazily written, insulting rubbish and it's unquestionably one of the worst films of the year. Avoid like your life depended on it.
Matthew Turner - ViewLondon
Puerile beyond belief and a possible hazard to brain cells, the only thing this offensive dross gets right is the title.
Glen Ferris - Empire Magazine
The result is a series of extraneous, deplorably unfunny scenes and sketches stitched together in completely haphazard fashion.
Derek Adams - Time Out
Irrelevant, never-funny references to everything from Juno to American Gladiators
Rich Cline - Shadows on the Wall
Why, oh why, is the spoof franchise that began with Scary Movie still churning 'em out?
Dean Essner - Total Film
I wish to God they would find something else to do.
Anthony Quinn - Independent
Personally, The Sneak would like to place Friedberg and Seltzer on a blazing upside-down boat which is about to be hit by a meteorite.
Dean Essner - Sun Online
It's hard to put into words just how excruciatingly painful it is to watch Disaster Movie, but let's just say it will make you appreciate those dreadful experiences in your life like, say, going to the dentist or waiting in line at the DMV.
Adam Tobias - Watertown Daily Times
By the time the disco-dancing, man-eating chipmunks turned up, my mind had turned to the weekend.
Victor Olliver - Teletext
I checked, The Opposite of Funny Movie and Awful Film were available for titles, but Disaster Movie works absolutely perfect.
Jeff Bayer - The Scorecard Review
It's not the worst of the franchise, but it's dangerously close.
Wesley Lovell - Oscar Guy
Wesley Lovell - Cinema Sight
Insert "of a" between the two title words and you have my opinion of this film
Jackie K. Cooper - jackiekcooper.com
Every time one of these Friedberg-Seltzer movies is released the sum total of human knowledge is reduced.
Ken Hanke - Mountain Xpress (Asheville, NC)
No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No! Wrong!!!
Austin Kennedy - Sin Magazine
None of it is amusing, so there's probably enough suicide-inducing material here to make a send-up of The Happening redundant.
Liz Braun - Jam! Movies
Crude, dumb spoof isn't worth your time or money.
Sandie Angulo Chen - Common Sense Media
Cobbled together with plotlines, characters, catchphrases and other assorted gimmicks still lodged in the short-term memory cavities of our pop cultural consciousness.
Rob Humanick - Slant Magazine
Consider the word 'putrid.' If I had an online personal dictionary, the films of Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer would link to my definition of that word.
Linda Cook - Quad City Times (Davenport, IA)
Having to watch and review 'Disaster Movie' must be payback for the juvenile pranks I took part in as a teenager.
Betty Jo Tucker - ReelTalk Movie Reviews
Movie metaphor junkies be on high alert, for a horny Dr. Phil, Michael Jackson hiding out in a car trunk with a little boy and a pet chimp for good measure, and a bad imitation Juno blasting lactating breast milk as a deadly weapon.
Prairie Miller - NewsBlaze
I half expected to see the spoof-making team in direct address, explaining the supremacy of the tentpole uber-alice, perhaps while backed by Emperor Palpatine.
Sara Maria Vizcarrondo - Boxoffice Magazine
It's too easy to say Disaster Movie deserves its title, but why put more effort into trashing it than the filmmakers did into writing it?
Sam Adams - AV Club
It's sad when a movie is so bad, it becomes the subject of late-night debates on whether it's better or worse than Uwe Boll's Postal.
Kevin Carr - Film School Rejects
Like the bastard child of Best Week Ever and the mud that runs off of football players' cleats after a rainy game, this isn't a movie you see. It's one you survive.
Matt Pais - Metromix.com
Here's what they got right: The name of the movie. Disaster, indeed.
Christopher Smith - Bangor Daily News (Maine)
So ugly, unpleasant and devoid of laughs that the notion of releasing a film with such a title on the third anniversary of Hurricane Katrina is actually one of the least offensive things about it.
Peter Sobczynski - eFilmCritic.com
Yet another entry in the Jason Friedberg-Aaron Seltzer series of movie spoofs, this scattershot collection lame gags is the definition of disposable entertainment.
Maitland McDonagh - TV Guide's Movie Guide
It's quite frankly stultifying that Friedberg are Seltzer are ever let anywhere near a studio boardroom after having defecated out their previous movies, much less this one.
Todd Gilchrist - IGN Movies
As depressing and empty a cinematic experience as any other picture this year or last (or maybe the whole decade). To label it as simply unfunny or vacuous or ugly or boring would be a compliment.
Dustin Putman - DustinPutman.com
I'm not sure if Disaster is the worst movie the boys have churned out, but, at this point, that's like asking if a bullet hurts more than a knife.
Brian Orndorf - BrianOrndorf.com
Come on, pedophilia is funny and a Michael Jackson joke is never not timely, right? Wrong. It's not timely or funny.
Joshua Tyler - CinemaBlend.com