“"Blart!!!!!!!Fart!!!!This Actor James Is A Wet Fart!!!Always The Sammmeee.....But I Love Him"”
“K. James Is Always Funny”
“Decent Comedy Delivers But Nothing Special.”
“NOT Kevin James' Best Movie.”
“I Don't Drink”
“I Prefer Hand Written Sentiments”
“Scuba Dooby Doo.”
“Paul Blart Is Not A Bad Ass... I Think Not”
“Detroit Rock City I Was Wondering Were You Serious About That Happy Meal? -It's Not Comin Is It? -Whats That?, The Loch Ness Monster -Let The Record Show I Never Hit A Women -I Just Put All My Weight On Her”
“Im Wondering Why The Studio Didn't Send This Straight To DVD.”
“Humm, Renta Cop”
“The King And Queen Of Comedy.”
“Peanut Blart And Jelly!”
“An Enjoyable Film”
“F*** Off. I Liked It. ”
[Kevin James] proves to be a warm leading man who grounds the movie as it morphs into a loopy heist thriller after a promising start as something entirely different: a gentle comedy of suburban underachievement.
Adam Markovitz - Entertainment Weekly
Directed by Steve Carr, a man who knows how to put a camera in front of things, if little else, and written, sort of, by Nick Bakay and Mr. James.
Nathan Lee - New York Times
The last name Blart may be the funniest thing in the movie, so that's a hint as to just how bad this shopping-center saga can be.
Claudia Puig - USA Today
[Has] such obviously humble intentions that busting on it is a bit like harassing the junior high school outcast who just wants to eat his tater tots in peace.
Jen Chaney - Washington Post
It's unlikely that even WALL-E could bring himself to scoop up this movie and leave it on his post-apocalyptic junk heap.
Wesley Morris - Boston Globe
Perfectly inoffensive and almost entirely unfunny.
Elizabeth Weitzman - New York Daily News
Lisa Kennedy - Denver Post
Paul Blart: Mall Cop is a slapstick comedy with a hero who is a nice guy. I thought that wasn't allowed anymore.
Roger Ebert - Chicago Sun-Times
To call this Kevin James comedy fatuous might be misinterpreted as an attack on the star's girth -- so how about inane, tepid, lazy, puerile, phony, and unfunny?
Andrea Gronvall - Chicago Reader
The film is completely forgettable, frequently funny and weirdly satisfying in a Jersey Loser Gets Respect kind of way.
Carrie Rickey - Philadelphia Inquirer
A senseless Hollywood comedy.
Daniel Getahun - Minneapolis Star Tribune
Sensationally stupid, haphazardly made and qualifying as unmitigated trash by any standards, Paul Blart: Mall Cop also manages to be consistently hilarious, thanks to star Kevin James.
Tom Long - Detroit News
Give this to Paul Blart: Mall Cop: It delivers on everything it promises. Which is to say, nearly nothing.
Bill Goodykoontz - Arizona Republic
An almost shockingly amateurish one-note-joke comedy on which the star also shares writing and producing credit.
Brian Lowry - Variety
Laughs occasionally ensue.
Kyle Smith - New York Post
The thin comic appeal of Kevin James is laid on a bit thicker in Paul Blart: Mall Cop, his first solo star vehicle for the big screen.
Roger Moore - Orlando Sentinel
It's surprisingly okay, in a January kind of way.
Peter Howell - Toronto Star
Christine Champ - Film.com
James, at his best when he lets loose, plays his character a little too straight and so loses some of the movie's comic potential.
Jennie Punter - Globe and Mail
As cheapo larks go, it's a winningly unassuming one: no stars, no big action set pieces. Just a fat guy, a near-empty mall, and a lot of really ridiculous ideas.
Dana Stevens - Slate
It's a juvenile motion picture designed primarily for a juvenile audience. But there's a little more here than one might reasonably expect.
James Berardinelli - ReelViews
Like the movie's sad-sack hero, this comedy never comes close to achieving its real potential.
Kirk Honeycutt - Hollywood Reporter
[James] plays yet another misfit, but one who's so two-dimensional, needy (and frankly annoying) that it's difficult to root for him.
Christy Lemire - Associated Press
Peter Travers - Rolling Stone
[The film] oo often settles for easy, lazy jokes, most of which revolve around either food or running into stuff.
Glenn Whipp - Los Angeles Times
Hank Sartin - Time Out
Hank Sartin - Time Out Chicago
Dean Essner - Digital Spy
Dave White - Movies.com
Doesn't offer anything new but it is an ample addition to the comedy genre, and after a mostly rip-roaring 91 minutes, you'll understand how the film did so well in America.
Sam Bathe - Fan The Fire
...a hopelessly underwhelming comedy...
David Nusair - Reel Film Reviews
Unfunny, unoriginal and tedious - Mall Cop is successful only at living up to the standard set by past films that have begun with the words 'A Happy Madison Production'.
Anders Wotzke - Cut Print Review
Anders Wotzke - Moviedex
It's only almost the making of a comedy classic.
Rob Humanick - Projection Booth
The title and premise alone sound like every stupid comedy you've avoided for decades. Something was different %u2013 something was done right. Three other friends shared my secret shame enjoying this amiable, broad %u2013 and subtle %u2013 romantic act
Karina Montgomery - Cinerina
About ten times funnier than the similarly-themed Observe & Report, though this silly, slapstick adventure is aimed more at kids than adults.
Kam Williams - NewsBlaze
An unfunny comedy with a limited imagination and a steady diet of fat jokes.
Robert Roten - Laramie Movie Scope
The numerous making-of featurettes includes a treat for those of us in eastern Massachusetts with the Burlington Mall highlighted...
Robin Clifford - Reeling Reviews
...a genial, inoffensive little comedy that coasts on the charm of its "King of Queens" star James...
Laura Clifford - Reeling Reviews
What's most disappointing here is that Kevin James appears capable of far more rich and subtle comedy than he's ever likely to be part of in a Happy Madison production.
Brian Webster - Apollo Guide
Y si, basicamente se trata de reirse del gordo. Pero como es el propio gordo quien sirve la broma, uno no se siente tan culpable y se rie con el.
Enrique Buchichio - Uruguay Total
I found myself really quite enjoying this film, partly for its cheerful guying of mall culture. The heroine, Amy, works on a hair extension stand called Unbeweavable.
Julie Rigg - MovieTime, ABC Radio National
There's no doubt that James is a fine comedic actor and the role of Paul Blart fits his big frame like a well worn glove. As writers, however, he and Bakay rely too heavily on slapstick...
Andrew J. McGlinn - FILMINK (Australia)
James makes a funny, likeable doofus, and the expansion of his girth since his hit sitcom The King of Queens is used to great comic effect.
Jim Schembri - The Age (Australia)
Men of a certain size will love Paul Blart - and his pursuit through the centre is remarkably inventive. Truly for all the family.
Victor Olliver - Teletext
Although juvenile, predictable and utterly forgettable, has an endearing central character in Kevin James
Louise Keller - Urban Cinefile
With only some scattershot scenes of physical humor, 'Paul Blart: Mall Cop' does little to keep viewers safe from boredom.
Dan Lybarger - eFilmCritic.com
to my surprise, once the action part of the story kicked in, "Paul Blart: Mall Cop" transformed into a rather enjoyable comic adventure.
Sean McBride - Sean the Movie Guy
An 'arresting' comedy. James' best work.
Clint Morris - Moviehole
Paul Blart: Mall Cop is a tongue-planted-firmly-in-cheek force to be reckoned with.
Bruce Bennett - Spectrum (St. George, Utah)
a good-natured, but awkward and often unfunny comedy that bounces from sad-sack pathos to slapstick action parody
James Kendrick - Q Network Film Desk
You can't be too hard on a film that blows up a Rainforest Cafe, can you?
James Plath - DVDTown.com
James Plath - Movie Metropolis
Thanks to Kevin James' earnest portrayal of an earnest guy, I was won over by the film's goofy charms.
Mike McGranaghan - Aisle Seat
I know this is January, the month where dreadful movies go to die, and I know we have to take what we can get. But this? Spring has rarely seemed so far away.
Kurt Loder - MTV
I really, really like Kevin James. But this is disappointing.
Linda Cook - Quad City Times (Davenport, IA)
Like a mall, has long stretches where you see nothing of interest and a generally stale air to it. Unlike a mall, you can't just browse and then move on to a better section.
Brian Gibson - Vue Weekly (Edmonton, Canada)
There's nothing quite like the words 'Happy Madison Productions' appearing on the screen to diminish my expectations concerning the movie about to unfold.
Ken Hanke - Mountain Xpress (Asheville, NC)
The Black Friday setting suggests that this was meant to be a holiday release, but it's not hard to see why the studio dumped this suckfest in January.
Hank Sartin - Time Out New York
James takes a Segway, a cheesy mustache and the comic idea of Die Hard in a mall and bumbles his way to a lightweight but frequently funny film for the whole family.
Michael Smith - Tulsa World
This isn't brain surgery; this is daffy entertainment that plays to its strengths, with director Steve Carr trusting in James' deadpan earnesty
Amy Nicholson - I.E. Weekly
James gives it everything he's got, totally committing to the character and delivering clean comedy which often times is often more difficult than creating just a raunch-fest.
Ben Lyons - At the Movies
Once you've seen about the first 20 minutes of the movie, you've got a sense of what all of the jokes were going to be.
Ben Mankiewicz - At the Movies
Kevin James throws his weight around as the dedicated mall cop, but sometimes his actions are more silly than funny.
Jackie K. Cooper - jackiekcooper.com
A couple of Segway jokes stretched to an hour and a half running time.
Katey Rich - CinemaBlend.com
It's a trivial pursuit, slathered with peanut butter.
Susan Granger - SSG Syndicate
...this is a masterpiece compared to anything Rob Schneider has put out only it suffers from the same form of stereotyping.
Michael Ferraro - Film Threat
The hero is named for a disgusting bodily function that's hardly PG material, but the movie itself seems to be aimed at grade schoolers.
Peter Canavese - Groucho Reviews
Just one long pratfall...an avalanche of really dumb action comedy that aims to be a variant on the Inspector Clouseau formula but fails miserably.
Frank Swietek - One Guy's Opinion
The film's drawback seems to be (Kevin) James' indecision on a tone as well as how to present Blart.
Bob Bloom - Journal and Courier (Lafayette, IN)
Adept at physical comedy, Kevin James -- who co-wrote the 'Paul Blart: Mall Cop' script -- emerges the king of his retail domain.
John P. McCarthy - ReelTalk Movie Reviews
Paul Blart tepidly goes through its motions, but that doesn't mean you have to.
Nick Schager - Cinematical
Kevin James' slapstick comedy will amuse older tweens.
Sandie Angulo Chen - Common Sense Media
So, as much as I hate to be mean, it is my solemn responsibility as a movie reviewer to award Paul Blart Mall Cop a Frowny Face. (Don't hate me, Kevin James! Or you either, Steve Carr!)
Philip Martin - Arkansas Democrat-Gazette
You might chuckle occasionally as the film drones on to a close, but mostly you'll be wondering when it will all end.
Chris Kaltenbach - Baltimore Sun
Forget the rocky character development. Give me a fat guy falling down, and I'll start to laugh.
Kevin Carr - 7M Pictures
Never delivers the big laughs this star in this promising premise really should.
Michael Dequina - TheMovieReport.com
Oh my goodness, it's a ripoff of Die Hard. A shameless ripoff that gets more and more shameless the longer it goes on...
MaryAnn Johanson - Flick Filosopher
The road from TV star to movie leading man is loaded with ill-conceived films.
Perry Seibert - TV Guide's Movie Guide
Paul Blart: Mall Cop is so inconsequential you forget about it even before the movie is over.
Robert W. Butler - Kansas City Star
Kevin James is hard not to like. He's a big, goofy, personable doofus better suited for a half-an-hour TV show like The King of Queens than trying to carry a 90-minute movie.
Gary Wolcott - Tri-City Herald
An inoffensive way to spend 90 minutes, unless of course you're on the husky end of the spectrum, in which case they're all going to laugh at you.
Travis Nichols - Seattle Post-Intelligencer
Paul Blart: Mall Cop is a perfect display of cliches and predictability but I couldn't help but laugh at Kevin James riding the scooter and his addiction to pixie sticks.
Kevin McCarthy - WJFK-FM (CBS Radio)
...a silly film that exists primarily as a vehicle for James... this marks the emergence of a comedy star who may get to fulfill the promise he shows here in films to come.
Daniel M. Kimmel - Worcester Telegram & Gazette
Parental Content Review
Jim Judy - Screen It!
Avoid this mall cop and just go shopping instead.
Pete Hammond - Hollywood.com
Just as James struggles to make unfunny material tolerable, so too does the supporting cast fall flat.
Tim Grierson - Screen International
This comedy from Adam Sandler's Happy Madison production company takes itself too seriously for its own good.
Jeff Vice - Deseret News, Salt Lake City
Paul Blart: Mall Cop is like the many variations on tuna surprise that show up at potlucks: generic but with a little something added to differentiate it.
Chris Hewitt (St. Paul) - St. Paul Pioneer Press
Mall cops everywhere should sue. The movie is trash.
Christopher Smith - Bangor Daily News (Maine)
It's just not particularly funny. That Segway, alas, only goes so far.
Moira MacDonald - Seattle Times
Paul Blart delivers laughs, yes, but it's only one great slapstick actor and a little bit of heart away from being just another truly idiotic comedy.
Matthew Razak - Examiner.com
I suppose the food equivalent would be that nacho cheese that comes in a can with little chunks of jalapeno mixed in.
Peter Hartlaub - San Francisco Chronicle
Who could have imagined that, mere days into 2009, we'd already have a formidable contender for the worst film of the year!?
Brandon Fibbs - Colorado Springs Gazette
Producer Adam Sandler must have though so little of the film that he didn't even see it fit for a Rob Schneider cameo.
Phil Villarreal - Arizona Daily Star
Some people really love goofy comedy, and for those people there's Paul Blart: Mall Cop. You can bring the kids.
Liz Braun - Jam! Movies
You'd better shop around%u2014you could probably find an unfunny comedy with an unappealing hero and clumsily shot action choreography for much less than retail price. Maybe the straight-to-DVD bin?
Frank Lovece - Film Journal International
"I just love this guy," James says of Paul Blart in the movie's production notes. For the sake of humanity I hope and pray that barely anyone else shares his affection.
Adam Tobias - Watertown Daily Times
unfathomably unfunny... centered around mean-spirited fat jokes
Bill Gibron - Filmcritic.com
mostly this film spins its wheels not unlike the way that Paul spins the wheels of his mall-issued Segway%u2122.
Andrea Chase - Killer Movie Reviews
This dim-bulb, family-oriented slapstick film benefits greatly from James' knack for physical comedy, but it's ultimately too bland and uninspired.
Eric D. Snider - EricDSnider.com
Somewhere beneath its mediocre comedic trappings, there's a decent action movie trying to fight its way free.
Luke Y. Thompson - L.A. Weekly
The end product won't win any Oscars, but the edges of this slapstick action film retain James's blitzkrieg sense of humor, making for a light comic adventure I'm positive kids will flip for.
Brian Orndorf - BrianOrndorf.com
Unlike James himself, the movie is a few bricks shy of a load, which explains why a movie obviously ticketed for a holiday release has backed up to mid-January.
Gary Thompson - Philadelphia Daily News
[James'] remarkably winning performance turns Blart into the ultimate underdog--a decent guy who's finally having the kind of day he deserves.
Matt Pais - Metromix.com
Not a bad premise, but most of the comedy just dies. Hard.
Matt Stevens - E! Online
Co-produced by Adam Sandler, Mall Cop has an innate sweetness that's reminiscent of Sandler's 1998 romantic comedy The Wedding Singer, although the laughs don't quite reach those levels.
Sue Pierman - Milwaukee Journal Sentinel
A shamelessly sentimental comedy with a few crude gags thrown in arbitrarily.
Nathan Rabin - AV Club
It's Die Hard meets Home Alone on a segway! Except, Kevin James is not as cute as Macaulay Culkin and not as tough as Bruce Willis.
Willie Waffle - WaffleMovies.com
Boring and predictable in both its narrative and its aesthetics, Paul Blart: Mall Cop is dumbed-down, low-rent slapstick with stereotypes galore and a violent undercurrent that doesn't sit well.
Dustin Putman - DustinPutman.com
...after a dismal first half hour, it changes from a piteous low intellect attempt at humor to a light-hearted takeoff on Bruce Willis and the "Die Hard" movies.
Tony Medley - Tolucan Times
James, who co-wrote, endows the title character with such piercing sweetness that even his geeky pretensions are endearing.
Nell Minow - Beliefnet
TV's King of Queens working stiff James relocates to Jersey in an even larger than life silly but good natured big screen laughathon, as the corpulent crimefighter who's more than a little obsessive about cornering anyone shopping around for trouble.
Prairie Miller - NewsBlaze
If you are a Kevin James fan you probably will want to see him rolling around, otherwise you can pass on this one to save a few bucks.
Jolene Mendez - Entertainment Spectrum
The shot of Blart quietly crawling into a hostage situation inside the mall's bank and walking through a roped line is a moment of absurd grace, only it's shot with the vulgarity of a Crash Test Dummies commercial.
Ed Gonzalez - Slant Magazine
James and Mays are engaging and a handful of moments do generate genuine laughs. Not enough to justify a paid night at the movies...
Wade Major - Boxoffice Magazine