“Hard To Do A Reboot On A Classic”
“I Went To See Some Sword Fighting And This Movie Delivered”
“All For For One And One For All- Now Run For The Freaking Exit Goddammit*”
“If You're Going To See The Three Musketeers, Don't Expect To See Much Of The Actual 3 Musketeers.”
“Surprisingly Fun, Despite The Flaws.”
“Intriguing And Action Packed”
Keith Staskiewicz - Entertainment Weekly
Owen Gleiberman - Entertainment Weekly
In the worst possible case, this could go on and on, but please, let's hope it doesn't.
Stephen Holden - New York Times
Nothing looks as messy as an unbuckled swash, and sadly that's what we get here.
Peter Bradshaw - Guardian [UK]
Call it the Robert Downey Jr. Meets Sherlock Holmes Effect. A classic popular adventure gets overblown, juiced-up, and generally CGI-ified.
Mark Feeney - Boston Globe
Even the most liberal viewer is likely to echo Milady's thoughts of D'Artagnan: "You are very amiable, no doubt, but you would be charming if you would only depart."
Elizabeth Weitzman - New York Daily News
Seriously: What the hell?
Michael Phillips - Chicago Tribune
This one is overblown, over-dressed, and grandiosely dopey, packed with gargantuan sets and ludicrous action scenes and shot in unusually dark and dingy 3-D.
Michael Wilmington - Chicago Reader
A very 2011 take on Alexandre Dumas' classic that feels weirdly dated already.
Leslie Felperin - Variety
This is a once-in-a-lifetime fiasco, an epic fail like none we have seen this year, a bad idea by a very bad director and a career-crippling credit for all concerned.
Roger Moore - Orlando Sentinel
The very existence of this film illustrates barrel-scraping desperation of the Hollywood kind.
Peter Howell - Toronto Star
Every time you think it can't get any stupider, it gets right up in your face, calls you "bro," and gets stupider.
Eric D. Snider - Film.com
All the borderline pantomime acting and wigged buffoonery is deliberate and silly, but The Three Musketeers remains charmless, a romp brought down by its lead-footed script.
Liam Lacey - Globe and Mail
3D swashbuckler wields a disappointingly blunt sword.
Neil Young - Hollywood Reporter
A befouling of Dumas.
Roger Moore - McClatchy-Tribune News Service
The film may have its fun moments but this adaptation does nothing more than make these Three Musketeers look like a bunch of Stooges.
Kristal Cooper - We Got This Covered
While you're busy looking at the special effects, you'll begin to notice that there's not really anything in the way of substance like a well-thought-out plot and characters that you care about.
Jeff Beck - Examiner.com
It's fun for a Saturday afternoon viewing, but it will ultimately go down in the annals of movie history as yet another forgettable adaptation.
Kevin Carr - 7M Pictures
Never has failure looked this good!
Jules Brenner - Cinema Signals
If you want over-the-top entertainment that doesn't respect the laws of physics, you can't do much better than this.
Ignatiy Vishnevetsky - Ebert Presents At The Movies
You might mistake the sound of swashbuckling for what it really is: Alexandre Dumas spinning in his grave. Much closer to 'Pirates of the Caribbean' lite than it is to 'The Three Musketeers,' this makes a mess of the classic Dumas tale.
Linda Cook - KWQC-TV (Iowa)
- St. Louis Post-Dispatch
Ugh. Nothing makes sense, it's not funny and the 3D is worthless.
Jeff Bayer - The Scorecard Review
Anderson has crafted a beautiful and rambunctious film that is in many ways a lot more fun than the last few Disney "Pirates of the Caribbean" films.
Bruce Bennett - Spectrum (St. George, Utah)
The actors should have remained dry-docked instead of shipping out on this big, bloated Three Muske-mess.
Neil Pond - American Profile
- Screen International
A frequent choice for transposing fiction into film, The Three Musketeers returns as an action-filled, slight diversion.
John Wirt - Advocate (Baton Rouge, LA)
So dumb and goofy and ridiculous that it's actually kind of hard not to like on those terms.
Ken Hanke - Mountain Xpress (Asheville, NC)
- Dark Horizons
- Austin Chronicle
So hammy and campy that Alexander Dumas would scarcely recognize this latest incarnation of his swashbuckling tale.
Susan Granger - SSG Syndicate
Have we retained nothing of the lessons of Hudson Hawk? Like that early Nineties comical disaster, The Three Musketeers hinges on the secret machinations of Leonardo da Vinci.
Kimberley Jones - Austin Chronicle
Gaudy and vulgar ...
Jim Lane - Sacramento News & Review
Alexander Dumas isn't merely turning in his grave, he's half way through re-enacting 'Thriller'.
Anders Wotzke - Cut Print Review
Alexandre Dumas isn't merely turning in his grave, he's half way through re-enacting 'Thriller'.
Anders Wotzke - Moviedex
Swashbuckler for tweens has tons of action but no heart.
Sandie Angulo Chen - Common Sense Media
Logan Lerman's adolescent D'Artagnan has a haircut that makes him look like Ally Sheedy, Christoph Waltz imitates a lisping John Malkovich as Cardinal Richelieu, and Milla Jovovitch turns Milady de Winter into an insipid ninja.
Peter Keough - Boston Phoenix
The same old story but with some new twists, a substantial cast, and some energetic special effects.
Jackie K. Cooper - jackiekcooper.com
Doomed to be referenced as an example of everything wrong with 21st cinema, "The Three Musketeers" is like a banana split prepared with in a blender. It looks like vomit, and leaves a knot in your stomach.
Cole Smithey - ColeSmithey.com
By the time we see sword fights onboard airships, the movie finally realizes what it needs to be -- goofy, silly fun. Too bad that comes after 90 minutes of failed opportunities.
Josh Hurst - Christianity Today
Paranormal Activity 3 delivers, and does it without gore or "look at me!" special effects.
Maitland McDonagh - Film Journal International
The movie suffers from the malady that all remakes have - if you change it too much it becomes unrecognizable and you upset people like me who want the same thing only modernized, if you keep it the same it becomes unoriginal and a pointless exercise.
Michelle Alexandria - Eclipse Magazine
Doesn't bode well for poor Alexandre Dumas who continues rolling in his grave.
Felix Vasquez Jr. - Cinema Crazed
I would never call this version a classic, but I was fairly entertained by it. Should a sequel be made, as the ending so clearly anticipates, I would happily go to see it.
Scott Nash - Three Movie Buffs
I wanted big and ludicrous and silly, with swords and airships. That's pretty much what I got.
Widgett Walls - Needcoffee.com
Director Paul W.S. Anderson has injected a great sense of fun in this visually sumptuous adventure
Louise Keller - Urban Cinefile
Anderson... permeates this updating of the classic Dumas novel with an infectious sense of joy. Unfortunately, it's still dumber than a bag of hammers.
Rob Vaux - Mania.com
Stiff, baby-faced Lerman could be the Mouseketeer in the Iron Mask ... In spots this blend of Dumas and "League of Extraordinary Gentlemen" sparks to life as the perfect Saturday matinee for 12-year-olds.
Glenn Lovell - CinemaDope
A splashy but silly and bombastic (as well as curiously dull) farrago more reminiscent of 'Pirates of the Caribbean' than Dumas.
Frank Swietek - One Guy's Opinion
They don't make period romps like they used to, but The Three Musketeers comes close; all it needs is a bit more sex
Andrew L. Urban - Urban Cinefile