“Oh, You Hate Me So, Don't Ya? But You Made Me, Crusader. You Hate What You Made. You Fear It Because It Is Superior To You. For Six Hundred Years, I've Fed On Your Kind At Will! ”
“John Carpenter And James Woods!”
Lisa Schwarzbaum - Entertainment Weekly
- Entertainment Weekly
Peter M. Nichols - New York Times
- USA Today
Amy Taubin - Village Voice
- Houston Chronicle
Roger Ebert - Chicago Sun-Times
Susan Stark - Detroit News
Lisa Nesselson - Variety
- Globe and Mail
Laura Miller - Salon.com
James Berardinelli - ReelViews
- Los Angeles Times
- Sight and Sound
Rob Hunter - Film School Rejects
A suspense-free snark-fest desperate to turn its protagonist - vampire slayer Jack Crow (James Woods) - into a Snake Plisskin-style icon of supernatural-badass cool.
Nick Schager - Lessons of Darkness
Felix Vasquez Jr. - Cinema Crazed
Joe Lozito - Big Picture Big Sound
Grungy, disreputable fun -- the kind of blood-and-tequila western that can only be made nowadays when disguised as a horror movie.
Rob Gonsalves - eFilmCritic.com
Jeffrey M. Anderson - Combustible Celluloid
Woods is entertaining as badass vampire hunter Jack Crow, but the meanness he exhibits toward his young priest assistant is offensive and completely unnecessary. Still, this is Carpenter's best film since the 1980s ended.
Chuck O'Leary - FulvueDrive-in.com
- Time Out
Robin Clifford - Reeling Reviews
Dragan Antulov - rec.arts.movies.reviews
The movie is basically one-note: A vampire is harpooned and dragged out into the daylight where the body instantly explodes into flames. Creativity in action, for sure.
James Sanford - Kalamazoo Gazette
Susan Tavernetti - Palo Alto Weekly
JoBlo - JoBlo's Movie Emporium
- Film Threat
James Rocchi - Netflix
Margaret A. McGurk - Cincinnati Enquirer
Emily Blunt - Blunt Review
Shlomo Schwartzberg - Boxoffice Magazine
...little more than an excuse to watch people kill each other in the most brutal possible ways.
John J. Puccio - DVDTown.com
John J. Puccio - Movie Metropolis
- Boston Phoenix
Kim Newman - Sight and Sound
Jeremiah Kipp - ToxicUniverse.com
I [need a] thesaurus for words to describe this execrable,detestable, fetid,stinky,crappy,ghastly, monstrous,wretched,rancid mess.
Karina Montgomery - Cinerina
Robert Roten - Laramie Movie Scope
Marc Savlov - Austin Chronicle
Rob Blackwelder - SPLICEDWire
- Deseret News, Salt Lake City
Scott Renshaw - rec.arts.movies.reviews
- Irish Times
Edward Johnson-Ott - NUVO Newsweekly
Dan Jardine - Apollo Guide
James Brundage - Filmcritic.com
It is a sad state of affairs when John Carpenter can make something as misguided and flatly written and filmed as Vampires.
Dustin Putman - DustinPutman.com
Paul Tatara - CNN.com
I'd rather have Peter Vincent on my side than Jack Crow and company.
Widgett Walls - Needcoffee.com
Gemma Files - eye WEEKLY
You have to hand it to James Woods: He doesn't go out of his way to make himself likeable on screen.
Maitland McDonagh - Film Journal International
Bob Graham - San Francisco Chronicle
Steve Rhodes - Internet Reviews
Harvey S. Karten - Compuserve
Joe Baltake - Sacramento Bee
Carpenter turns John Steakley's novel "Vampire$" into a perverse remake of Howard Hawks' "Rio Bravo" by way of Sergio Leone and "The Wild Bunch."
Sean Axmaker - Nitrate Online
Madeleine Williams - Cinematter
Urban Cinefile Critics - Urban Cinefile
MaryAnn Johanson - Flick Filosopher
Bill Chambers - Film Freak Central
John Paul Powell - Jam! Movies
- Empire Magazine
Susan Granger - rec.arts.movies.reviews
Jon Popick - Planet Sick-Boy
David Keyes - Cinemaphile.org
Mark R. Leeper - rec.arts.movies.reviews
The laughable dialogue and lack of plot isn't as problematic as the uninteresting and unlikable characters.
Michael Dequina - TheMovieReport.com
Jack Garner - Rochester Democrat and Chronicle
- E! Online