FCC CHIEF PROPOSES NEW RULES FOR PRODUCT PLACEMENTS
Because digital TV recorders like TiVo allow viewers to skip commercials, advertisers are going to integrate their messages into the content of shows. FCC Chairman Kevin Martin announced Thursday that the commission plans to launch a rule-making proceeding on product placements.
Here is a list of plots integrating commercials.
On Lost:
The Dharma Initiative will be changed to the "Dharma and Greg DVD Boxset Initiative."
It will be revealed that Ben has all his money and power from founding Ben & Jerry's and its new flavor is "Smothered Others."
Hurley gets heartburn from the Subway Diet so Jack prescribes Pepcid AC.
On The Office:
Michael discovers all the computers have pirated copies of Windows so he goes to Microsoft headquarters to try and apologize to Bill Gates.
Dwight no longer plays World of Warcraft (Blizzard Entertainment wouldn't pay for plugs) so he is now a WebKinz addict who plays with his virtual pet so much that his real dog dies from inattention.
BATMAN 3 will face off against his most cunning foe, the Hamburglar who steals the recipe for the secret sauce, exposes Mayor McCheese in a prostitution scandal, and kills the Fry Guys by dunking them in hot oil.
SONY'S GOAL: CONNECT EVERYTHING
Sony CEO Howard Stringer on Thursday envisioned a day when most, if not all, the company's products can be connected to the Internet and with each other. In Stringer's view of the future, users of Sony television sets would be able to watch Sony movies on demand or play games with others using Sony PlayStation consoles.
Sounds great if you have the big bucks to spend on high-technology. What will the future be like for integrated products for the poor?
On your Wal-mart brand television:
You can play on-line lottery tickets.
You can play Grand Theft Tobacco: Marlboro City where you kill the government agents trying to take your smokes away.
Automatically record COPS reruns so you can see relatives you haven't seen in a while.
The television automatically turns its volume up so neighbors can't hear domestic abuse.
NBC REMOVES PREDATOR STORY FROM WEBSITE
NBC has removed all reference to NBC Dateline's "To Catch a Predator" sting in Murphy, TX during which an assistant county prosecutor shot and killed himself after police arrived at his house. NBC settled the lawsuit on Wednesday.
Maybe if someone killed themselves because of Ugly Betty, they'd take that off the air too. You gotta have a dream.
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