Hey friendo's. Brian Gallagher here with a look at all the news that wasn't fit for print in the past seven days. We've got plenty of goodies to get to this week so let's start with another movie invention that is becoming a reality.
Back in May there was news that some genius actually invented a real-life hoverboard like the one Michael J. Fox uses in Back To The Future Part II. Now MSNBC.com reports that Nike is actually making self-lacing shoes similar to those shown in Back To The Future Part II as well. It was said that Nike has filed a patent for the shoes and, while it wasn't said when these shoes will hit the market, they are working on the technology. Take a look at this confusing image below:
Here's an excerpt from the actual patent application as well:
"The automatic lacing system provides a set of straps that can be automatically opened and closed to switch between a loosened and tightened position of the upper. The article further includes an automatic ankle cinching system that is configured to automatically adjust an ankle portion of the upper."
I'm down with a hoverboard, but how lazy have we really become that Nike is making self-lacing shoes? Tie your own damn shoes, people... and order me one of those hoverboards.
Ving Rhames' "Oscar speech" For Piranha 3D - via Funny or Die
Piranha 3D seems to be a regular here on The Sunday Funnies. Last week we showed you a "for your consideration" video for Piranha 3D and this week we have what an Oscar speech from the wonderful Ving Rhames would look like. Take a look at the hilarity below:
OK, how cool would it be to see Ving Rhames throwing shoes into the Oscar crowd? Probably about as cool as it would be to see Ving Rhames "jackin" people for Oscars. Make it happen, AMPAS, or Ving Rhames will bring the ruckus! Hmm, maybe that will be next week's Piranha 3D video, Ving Rhames flipping people upside down and ganking their Oscar's. Hilarity.
Insane Star Trek: The Next Generation Casting Possibilities - via Letters of Note
"What-if" stories are always kind of lame, to me, but this what-if story is just so out there I couldn't help but include it this week. Letters of Note has found an internal memo from Paramount, circa 1987, which reveals that actors such as Wesley Snipes and Yaphet Kotto were once in talks to star in Star Trek: The Next Generation. Apparently Wesley Snipes was up for Lt. Geordi, which went to LeVar Burton and Yaphet Kotto was up for Captain Picard, which Patrick Stewart won. Take a look at this intriguing memo below:
What's even more interesting as these potential cast members is that actual cast members Wil Wheaton and Brent Spiner weren't listed on this memo. What's also crazy is that Kevin Peter Hall, the 7'2" actor who is best known as being the original Predator and Harry from Harry and the Hendersons, was up for both Data and Geordi. A 7-foot-2-inch-tall dude playing Data? Hindsight is always 20/20, but I just can't see this at all...
Taylor Lautner Becomes a Diva, Sues RV Company - via THR Esquire
While The Twilight Saga: Eclipse star Taylor Lautner is only 18 years of age, the unimaginable success of three crappy movies must have really gotten to his head. THR Esquire has found a lawsuit that Taylor Lautner filed last week in Los Angeles against McMahon's RV dealership for breach of contract and fraud. Why, you say? Because McMahon's was supposed to deliver a tricked-out RV to Taylor Lautner - which he paid $300,000 for - in June so Taylor Lautner could use it for his trailer on his new film Abduction. Apparently, they missed the deadline and now Taylor Lautner is suing this Irvine, California company.
You can CLICK HERE to read the entire lawsuit in all of its legalese and boredom. I can't tell you how badly I want to be an employee of that RV company, just so I might be able to say this to Taylor Lautner: "Keep your shirt on, Mr. Lautner. You'll get your RV..."
Star Wars: Episode V - The Empire Strikes Back As a Silent Film - via The Daily Dish
Ever wonder how Star Wars: Episode V - The Empire Strikes Back's iconic Luke vs. Vader fight scene would look like in black and white... and as a silent film? Well then you're in luck because The Daily Dish has found a hilarious YouTube video of that scene featuring cutting-edge black and white colorization techniques and state-of-the-art dialogue cards to bring you a glimpse at how this iconic scene might look like if it was done in the 1920s. Check out the video below:
Behold the power of the Dark Side with no dialogue!
Scott Pilgrim Vs.The Matrix - via Heat Vision Blog
Mash-up videos never seem to get old and this week Heat Vision Blog has discovered a new video featuring audio from the Scott Pilgrim Vs. the World trailer and footage from The Matrix and its sequels The Matrix Reloaded and The Matrix Revolutions. Take a look at the hilarity below:
If only Michael Cera knew kung fu...
M. Night Shyamalan Spoofs Himself and Devil in "Escalation" - via MTV Movies Blog
You've got to love a director like M. Night Shyamalan for having a sense of humor. His next film Devil, which he produced and came up with the story for, hits theaters on September 17 and revolves around a group of strangers trapped in an elevator and one might not be whom he/she seems to be. M. Night Shyamalan decided to spoof his upcoming film with "Escalation," with Penthouse Pet Ryan Keely, some dude and M. Night Shyamalan himself, which features three strangers trapped... on an escalator. Take a look at the video below:
I wonder what will be funnier: this video or the box office take from Devil...
Well, that's about all I have for this week's edition of the Sunday Funnies. If you have any suggestions of articles/crazy stuff you'd like to see made fun of on future installments of Sunday Funnies, you can post on my wall here at MovieWeb: movieweb.com/u/gallagher OR follow me on Twitter @GallagherMW to send me funny links or chat about movies or whatever strikes your fancy. Peace in. Gallagher out!