The Dick Van Dyke Show - Season 5 Episodes

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Episode 0

The Dick Van Dyke Show Revisited

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Episode 1

Coast-to-Coast Big Mouth

Laura blurts out a top secret on a national television quiz show--that comedian Alan Brady wears a toupee.

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Episode 2

A Farewell to Writing

Rob sets out to write a book during his vacation, but has trouble getting started.

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Episode 3

Uhny Uftz

Rob sees a flying saucer and tracks it to its lair--the office above his own.

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Episode 4

The Ugliest Dog in the World

Rob and Laura try to find a permanent home for an ugly little mutt from the dog pound.

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Episode 5

No Rice at My Wedding

Rob and Laura recall their courtship days, when Rob almost lost Laura to another man. Van Williams guest-stars.

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Episode 6

Draw Me a Pear

Rob and Laura enroll in an art class--and the beautiful instructress has designs on Rob.

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Episode 7

The Great Petrie Fortune

Rob's dreams of inheriting a fortune are dashed until he realizes the intangible worth of an old photograph.

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Episode 8

Odd But True

Rob is offered $500 because the freckles on his back are in the shape of the Liberty Bell.

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Episode 9

Viva Petrie

Rob and Laura have an unusual houseguest, a bullfighter named Manuel who installs himself as a handyman.

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Episode 10

Go Tell the Birds and Bees

When Richie spins a few fantastic stories for his friends, his parents wind up in the school psychologist's office.

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Episode 11

Body and Sol

Rob recalls the time he defended his title as middleweight champion of the Army camp.

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Episode 12

See Rob Write -- Write, Rob, Write

Rob and Laura become rivals when each writes a story for children.

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Episode 13

You're Under Arrest

Rob goes out to cool off after a quarrel with Laura and winds up in trouble with the law.

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Episode 14

Fifty-Two, Forty-Five or Work

Rob recalls the time he was out of work with a new home, no furniture, and a pregnant wife.

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Episode 15

Who Stole My Watch?

Rob loses his friends as well as his watch when the friends learn they're all under suspicion.

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Episode 16

I Do Not Choose to Run (Part 1 of 2)

Rob can't make up his mind when asked to be a candidate for the city council. Arte Johnson guest-stars.

The Dick Van Dyke Show S5E17
Episode 17

The Making of a Councilman (Part 2 of 2)

Rob agrees to run for office but realizes he'd prefer to vote for his brainy opponent. Wally Cox guest-stars.

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Episode 18

The Curse of the Petrie People

Rob's parents give a family heirloom piece of jewelry to Laura, who accidentally drops it in the garbage disposal.

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Episode 19

The Bottom of Mel Cooley's Heart

When Mel Cooley takes Rob's advice and stands up to Alan Brady, he is promptly fired.

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Episode 20

Remember the Alimony

Rob and Laura recall the time they filled in an application for a $10 divorce.

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Episode 21

Dear Sally Rogers

As a gag, Sally advertises for a husband on a national television show and is flooded with fan mail.

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Episode 22

Buddy Sorrell, Man and Boy

Symptoms and evidence indicate that Buddy is either seeing a psychiatrist or having an affair.

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Episode 23

Bad Reception in Albany

Rob and Laura attend a wedding in Albany. In order to get an idea for a sketch, Rob has to locate a television set to watch a special show.

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Episode 24

Talk to the Snail

Believing that comedian Alan Brady plans to cut down his writing staff, Rob applies for a job with a ventriloquist. Paul Winchell, Henry Gibson guest-star.

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Episode 25

A Day in the Life of Alan Brady

The Petries' anniversary party for the Helpers turns into a television documentary for Alan Brady.

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Episode 26

Obnoxious, Offensive, Egomaniac, Etc.

Rob and his writers are in big trouble for adding insults to an Alan Brady script.

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Episode 27

The Man from My Uncle

The Petrie home becomes a command post when government agents put a neighbor's home under surveillance. Godfrey Cambridge guest-stars.

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Episode 28

You Ought to Be in Pictures

Rob is cast opposite a gorgeous Italian actress in a low-budget film and turns out to be the screen's worst lover.

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Episode 29

Love Thy Other Neighbor

Rob and Laura are dismayed by Millie Helper's jealousy of their new neighbors.

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Episode 30

Long Night's Journey into Day

Laura and Millie spend a harrowing night alone when Rob and Jerry go off on a fishing trip.

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Episode 31

The Gunslinger

The Petries and their friends are transported to the Wild West when Rob dreams he is a frontier sheriff.

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Episode 32

The Last Chapter

Rob's autobiography conjures up scenes from the past and leads Alan Brady to buy the book for a television series.