Both disappointed in love, best friends Lizzie (Sally Golan) and Sam (Rebecca Blumhagen) explore the bar scene in search of free drinks and hot men. When Sam learns that her dream guy, Richard (Christopher Newell), is newly single, the girls set their sights on getting him into Sam’s bed. Lizzie finds a “dirty, hot guy” (Topher Mikels) and learns there is no such thing as no-strings-attached sex. Lizzie’s co-worker (Jessie Liebman) tries to pick up Sam.
Sam pursues her dream guy, but faces competition from his hot young neighbor. Can she disprove the notion that nice girls finish last? Lizzie goes undercover to gather evidence in a sexual harassment case, but finds herself getting a little too involved.
Fed up with men who play games, the girls pursue a younger crop of guys with no game. Jason is excited about his date with a woman who doesn’t play games…or so he thinks.
When her neighbor’s moans of ecstasy interfere with Sam’s ability to fill her needs between the sheets with new sex buddy Danny (Russell Brandi), she goes shopping for new hardware to help in the bedroom. Will that be enough to recapture her mojo, or will she have to take more drastic measures?
Lizzie challenges faux Latina vixen Mariposa (Alyse Zwick) to see who can rope in a man by being a bigger bitch; Rule #9, “Always Be the Bigger Bitch.” Sam, utilizing the rule, channels her inner bitch to snag a handsome bike messenger.
After seeing a very ordinary woman with a handsome younger man, Lizzie and Sam go on a mission to find the source of a “magic pussy,” the kind that mesmerizes and hypnotizes guys into subordination.
Sam violates a key depraved girl rule when she starts to fall for Danny, her “friend with benefits.” A sci-fi movie marathon inspires Kaylie (Riley Steele) and Jordan (Cody Deal) to try a little role-playing to spice things up.
When Sam and Lizzie see Kaylie’s boyfriend with another woman at a bar, they decide to help her get even – but first they need evidence. Their spying leads Sam to an old flame. Jason expresses his cynicism about the rules and tries to prevent Kaylie from adopting them.
Sam can’t tell if Devon (Alex Benjamin), her hot new project partner, is gay, which leads the girls to seek counsel from Tyler (Joe Kamara), their gay advice guru. Meanwhile, Lizzie thinks she has found the perfect GBF (gay best friend), but finds herself mistaken when their drunken partying unexpectedly leads to scandalous new territory.
Lizzie and Sam get a surprise visit from Sienna (Whitney Kimball Long), their “Depraved Rules” mentor, who concocts a phony bachelorette party to help them pick up men. When Sienna learns that Sam is interested in Jason, she decides to help Sam get her man by any depraved means necessary.
Sam is angry and distracted, so Lizzie sends her to see Dr. Feelgood. The doctor prescribes something for anxiety and depression, which Sam resents -- she just needs something to help her focus. Lizzie puts her in touch with Pill Pusher Patty, who trades some uppers for Sam's scrip. Sam takes the pills and turns into a model of efficiency. When she runs out of pills, she has Patty meet her at a house party she and Lizzie will be attending. Lizzie's ex, Drew, is at the party, as is Richard. When the girls arrive, Sam ignores Richard and makes a beeline for Patty; once she has her pills, Sam finds Richard, who is quite drunk, and takes him home with her. Lizzie finds Drew, who feels down because his new girlfriend is cheating. Lizzie gloats over this development, which only depresses Drew. He withdraws to a bedroom, which is where Patty finds him and consoles him with sex. Lizzie stumbles on them and realizes she's the only one at the party who didn't hook up. Back at her apartment, Sam manages to get Richard into bed. He passes out, penis erect, thanks to another of Patty's pills.
It's just another boring Sunday until Sienna breezes into the dive bar and announces she's staying until her husband apologizes for reading in the bathroom. She decides to show her protégés how to get a man's attention and gets aggressive with a Muscle-Bound Dude sitting at the bar. He's a cop, and he arrests her. Sam is sobered by the incident and thinks that Sienna's rules are guaranteed to keep them alone. She's ready for a change and asks co-worker Kate about her new boyfriend, Shermann. He's a public defender, and agrees to pull a few strings to try to get Sienna released. Sienna's husband, Nathaniel, visits her in jail. She apologizes, he forgives her, and she vows to try to stop sabotaging their relationship. Kate tells Shermann about her 10-date rule, and he suggests they have all 10 dates in one day; at day's end, they can then have sex within her rule. Sam types up all of Sienna's rules and shows Lizzie the ones she questions. Lizzie is reluctant to give up any of them. Sienna is released and bumps into the Muscle-Bound Dude at the desk. He talked to Nathaniel and has agreed to drop the charges. Nathaniel awaits Sienna in the jail's visiting room, where they have sex.
Lizzie and Sam fight over Lizzie's acceptance of Drew's invitation to have drinks. Sam insists that this will lead to another reconciliation and break-up, and that it's time for Lizzie to end the relationship completely. It turns out that this time Drew just wants Lizzie to have her friend at the DMV fix some parking tickets for him -- he has reconciled with his cheating girlfriend. Sam bumps into Jason and lets it slip that she has a crush on him. Jason is free, since Lulu dumped him, and asks Sam out. As Sam readies for her date, Lizzie phones her to meet her at Drew's place, where they watch as a cop boots Drew's car -- Lizzie's revenge and a farewell to Drew. The girls celebrate at the dive bar, toasting their new rules: no more coercing guys to buy them drinks, no more young guys, no more b**ching, no more unrealized sexpectations, no more married guys, drinking contests or ex-boyfriends. Lizzie sees the Dirty Hot Guy and finally introduces herself; his name is Leo. Then Sam gets a text from Richard. She is torn, but opts for Jason. Lizzie and Leo also hook up for the night. Lizzie and Leo spoon contentedly after some hot sex, but sleeping in Jason's arms panics Sam, who gets up and leaves his place. She texts Lizzie to meet her -- she thinks she has just made a huge mistake...