The White Lotus reinvented the murder mystery and breathed a new complexity into the whodunit genre over the past two years. The HBO Max original series follows a consistent framework: a murder is revealed in the first few moments, though it’s not clear who the victim or perpetrator is. The timeline then reverts to a group of ultra-wealthy individuals arriving at the luxury island resort and follows the guests (and their drama) through to the end where the details of the murder are eventually revealed.
The dynamic between the plot and the stereotypical upper-class characters is addicting to watch, so much so that it has viewers inserting their own celebrity choices into the show. But what about fictional characters already known and loved? How would Jackie from That 70s Show fair within the murder mystery universe? Would Joe from You be revealed as the killer at the end of the season, or would that be too obvious? His inclusion might just set up a plot-twist of the decade.
Here are 10 fictional characters that we'd love to see in the next salacious season of The White Lotus.
10 Regina George
Regina George (Rachel McAdams) is the poster child for mean girls everywhere. She might seem like a lightweight within The White Lotus framework, but heed Janis Ian’s warning at the beginning of Mean Girls: “Evil takes a human form in Regina George. Don’t be fooled, because she might seem like your typical selfish, backstabbing s***-faced, h**-bag, but in reality, she is so much more than that.”
Imagine a Patton or Sullivan-style dynamic with Regina George as the scorned trophy wife. It would be a poetic ending to the line of housewives the show dragged over the coals at the hands of their husbands. Daphne Sullivan came close to rectifying the Patton relationship in the second season, but she was too reactive to be believed as a liberated character. Watching queen bee Regina George face down her brutish, unfaithful husband would bring salvation to both Rachel and Daphne. She would also be a solid contender for the season’s murderer.
9 Winston Schmidt
Every season needs a comic relief character, which is where Schmidt shines. New Girl’s fan-favorite (played by Max Greenfield) just got a promotion at the marketing firm, he’s finally gotten his co-workers to respect him, and he’s decided to treat himself to a luxury vacation at The White Lotus resort. This is the Schmidt before Cece, so most of his time is spent by the hotel bar where he meets the aforementioned Regina George.
At first, Regina mocks Schmidt’s advances, but after a few more chance encounters around the hotel she decides he's a nice relief from her brackish husband. They have an affair for the last half of the season, fueling the belief that Regina might be the killer and her husband is the victim.
8 Jackie Burkhart
This season could be one for the mean girls. That '70s Show's Jackie Burkhart (Mila Kunis) is taking herself on vacation on the dime of her absent, wealthy husband. She befriends Serena van der Woodsen at the beginning of the season but is quickly abandoned when her new friend embarks on a romantic side quest.
As Jackie struggles with her boredom and loneliness, she runs into Schmidt at the bar and strikes up a conversation with him. Schmidt is receptive of Jackie’s company, but when Regina enters the dining area with her husband, Schmidt gets jealous and begins to put on a show of flirting with his company. Regina notices and gets angry—no, murderously mad—but refuses to confront Schmidt about it. Schmidt continues to invite Jackie to dinner, which Jackie perceives as platonic. Each night, Regina’s anger builds as she sees Schmidt with Jackie eating dinner.
7 Jay Gatsby
What would a series critiquing the upper-class be without Jay Gatsby (Leonardo DiCaprio), fiction’s favorite social climber? Modern day Gatsby is still on the hunt for his long-lost love, Daisy Buchanan. He’s staying at The White Lotus because he’s read on The Daily Mail that the Buchanans have frequented the vacation spot during this time of the year.
To his surprise, he discovers they are staying at a neighboring luxury resort, which kicks off a search for her throughout the local tourist sites—and brings lavish parties to The White Lotus in hopes of catching her eye.
6 Hermione Granger
The young, frizzy-haired witch (Emma Watson) may seem like an odd choice for this list, but every murder-mystery needs its investigative mind. Hermione’s working the front desk at The White Lotus during her time away from Hogwarts on summer break, getting into numerous verbal altercations with a number of the guests (namely Regina George and her husband), prompting her to spend extra time in their rooms when she performs her daily room cleaning services.
She rifles through their belongings, hoping to discover why they all seem to be hiding something. She discovers Regina and Schmidt’s affair and debates telling Regina’s husband. The relationship between Hermione and Regina mimic Armond and Shane Patton’s, except the stakes are higher because the opponents are much more formidable.
5 Clare Devlin
The wee Derry Girls character (Nicola Coughlan) is Hermione’s coworker and anxious springboard. She’s been offered the opportunity to study abroad, and she’s taken a front desk job for some pocket change.
She quells the arguments between Hermione and the guest with her agreeable, people-pleasing nature. She’s the foil for her witchy friend, as she accompanies Hermione on her investigations through guest rooms, but not without frequent complaint. Clare’s nervous diatribes add to the tension throughout the season and Hermione’s storyline, leading viewers to believe the two girls are going to fall victim to something awful.
4 Wednesday Addams
Netflix’s Wednesday (Jenna Ortega) is on vacation with her family. After the past school year, her parents decided she’s in need of a break. The young girl is having a terrible time at the sunny resort filled with cheery people. Her tune changes when she overhears a conversation between Clare and Hermione at the front desk, and she decides to follow them up to the rooms.
When Hermione catches her lurking behind them, Wednesday confronts the pair and demands answers neither one of the girls have. Clare nervously tells Wednesday the whole truth, that Hermione is suspicious of the guests. Instead of getting angry, Wednesday requests to be let in on their investigations to which Hermione agrees.
3 Serena van der Woodsen
Gossip Girl's notorious Upper East Side socialite (Blake Lively) escaped to the luxury resort to put some distance between her and her trivial teenage dramas in the way only an adolescent from a wealthy family could. Of course, she already knows Jay Gatsby—they’ve been acquainted as they travel in the same wealthy New York circles. After spending an afternoon together, Gatsby confides in her the reason he’s staying at The White Lotus.
Swept up in the romance of it all, Serena agrees to help him in his hunt for Daisy. As they search different areas of the island with no sight of Gatsby's long-lost love, they begin to enjoy each other’s company. But towards the end of the season, the pair finally run into the Buchanans. The four spend a few days together before a confrontation between Gatsby and Tom breaks out, with Tom accusing Gatsby of being a mobster, insinuating that he might have killed before and could do so again.
2 Joe Goldberg
Now, it’s not as obvious as one would assume. Joe Goldberg (Penn Badgley) has shown to ability to self-reflect in the past three seasons of You, going through phases in which he tries his best to avoid stalking and murdering people. Those phases are short-lived, but he still tries. He’s living in the local town around The White Lotus, and bumps into Schmidt while getting lunch. Schmidt strikes up a conversation with Joe and invites him back to the hotel for drinks. While at the bar, Joe sees Serena and is immediately intrigued (the irony is noted).
Though Schmidt points out that Joe is a little strange, he keeps him around as company when he’s not with Regina. Joe realizes Serena is with Gatsby, mistaking them as a couple. He tries to fight the urge to look further into Serena, but when he unearths Gatsby’s mobster past, he decides her partner is dangerous, and he has no choice but to intervene. Joe spends the season following the pair and attempting, unsuccessfully, to insert himself into Serena’s life.
That is, until after the confrontation between Tom Buchanan and Gatsby. Serena flees the confrontation and Joe follows her to where she’s sitting alone, visibly upset. He introduces himself and consoles her, the third possible killer-victim pairing of the season.
1 Frank Gallagher
Does more need to be said? It would be a hilarious to watch Shameless' Frank Gallagher (William H. Macy) tear up a luxury resort and make all the rich guests uncomfortable. He would be the local town vagrant who somehow keeps making his way onto resort property. The season is filled with his antics, and his presence puts convenient wrenches into the plot lines of the other characters.
The season ends with a twist—Frank’s death. But, there is no direct murderer, only indirect killers in the form of self-absorbed guests who ignored he was intoxicated, floating face-down in the pool only a few yards away from the crowded outdoor dining area.