Out of the frying pan...

Welcome back to Dev-Hell for another round of the current projects we’ve got on the rack down here. Summer being the ‘hot’ movie season, all kinds of rumors start to fly, and we’ve got a bunch of them. Here’s the latest on what our satanic crowd is ‘whipping’ up for you!

Dark Horizons found a rumor of an overheard conversion about an interesting project: The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Klay. If this holds any water, then Paramount may have optioned the novel by Michael Chabon of Wonder Boys fame. It’s set in the 30’s and follows the adventures of two comic artists (whatever that is) and their Houdini-like escapism. Rumored leads are Jude Law, Ben Stiller and Jennifer Connelly. With Sydney Pollack directing and aiming for a summer 2003 release.

Jeff Sank, Jason and Justin Heimberg are writing something that’s currently being called Natural History Project. It will tell the story of a family that gets trapped in the Natural History Museum at the Smithsonian Institute, and some of the exhibits magically come to life. Sounds intriguing! Maybe even original! What’s it doing in here?

Kirsten Dunst may be attached to star in Wes Craven’s next project before filming Spider-Man 2. Pulse is based on a Japanese ghost story and is being written by Craven and Vince Gilligan (who was a writer on the X-Files.) Dunst may also take a role in the John Malkovich-produced indie film, Found in the Street. I don’t know much about either project, but I’m betting Kirsten somehow gets soaked...again...

Dreamworks has picked up Sleepless Knights from comic book creator Grant Morrison. The pitch concerned a time travel experiment that gets the world stuck on Halloween Eve and the spirits start running free. As reported on Dark Horizons, it follows a boy who joins a ghost busting team named The Sleepless Knights. Ha ha! Very punny. Will they be taking on the Stay-Puffed Marshmallow Man?

Undercover Brother scribe Michael McCullers is set to write the adaption of the children’s classic, Curious George for Imagine Entertainment. It’s currently planned as an all CGI film to be release through Universal. What’s the opposite of curious? Apathetic? Yep, that’s the word.

The Hollywood Reporter.com found out that Ice Cube is in talks to star in Warner Brothers motorcycle racing flick, Torque. They didn’t say if the title referred to the power of the motorcycles or the expected attitude of the audience, but if it’s an Ice Cube starring vehicle, I can guess...

Producer Charles Roven talked with SCIFI about the upcoming Good Omens, from writers Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman. Terry Gilliam and Tony Grisoni are trying hard to balance satire and blasphemy in the script. And Terry Gilliam is expected to direct! I’m trying to imagine collaboration between Pratchett, Gaiman and Gilliam. I think my brain just melted. Hold onto your pitchforks guys, this one’s going to be one hell of a ride!

We’ve got more casting rumors on The Alamo from FilmForce. It looks like Ethan Hawke may be up for the part of Alamo leader Lt. Col. William B. Travis, while Billy Bob Thornton and Russell Crowe are still rumored for Davy Crocket and General Sam Houston, respectively. Not to spoil anything for you, but the good news is that almost all of them get killed in the end. So you’ve got that going for you...

Warner Brothers has John Whitesell directing Suckaz, starring Jamie Kennedy. Kennedy re-portrays his sketch character of Gluckman, a white would-be rap star from Malibu who thinks he is from the ghetto. Then he finds out what the ghetto is really like. We’ll, it could be worse. Eminem could be making a movie...

Here’s a funny concept! Take twin brothers, separate them at birth and raise them at opposite ends of the socioeconomic ladder. Then, when they meet as adults, have them trade places! This horribly unoriginal concept is the plot of Don’t Get It Twisted (insert your own crude joke here.) Artisan Pictures ahs picked this project up from writing team Marcus Morton and the wonderfully named D.J. Pooh. That says it all! (Maybe they can get Van Damme, he's into the twin thing!)

Kasi Lemmons is directing The Battle of Cloverfield for Spider-Man producer Laura Ziskin. The story concerns ghosts of the past conspiring to change the future in a fictional Southern town. Looks like ghosts are the hot new topic these days...

Comic Adaption Hell:

Lou Ferrigno has shot a cameo appearance for the Hulk movie, according the E! Online. And they reveled a small plot point. Apparently Bruce Banner will be infected by a pack of feral, irradiated dogs – including a giant poodle. What? I’m stupefied! A poodle? Is this going to be a comedy?

Remake Hell:

If you head over to the Texas Film Commisson and check out Casting Calls, you’ll find the following listing:

THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE, an independent feature shooting in the Austin area from July to September, is seeking the following paid cast: Leatherface (male around 6'5", athletic and powerful), female age 16-22, male and female age 30's, male amputee age 60+, female age 60s and a strange looking boy age 9-13. Send headshots and resumes to:

Chainsaw Productions, LLC

1901 East 51st Street

Austin, TX 78723

(512) 476-0224 FAX

There’s no word if this is the long rumored remake, or something new. However, since the cast positions are listed in the paying jobs section, then you might assume it has funding – and therefore is the remake. Are you a big, ugly male? Or a strange looking boy? Then send them your info and become part of the destruction of a classic...

Sequel Hell:

Ah! Even though Bobby already caught you up on it, I’ve just got to mention it again. Another project to warm our hearts in Dev-Hell (not that we need any extra heat!) Hellraiser: Hellseeker is currently in production, with Dimension Films wanting to shoot two more Hellraisers back-to-back. Follow the link at Dark Horizons to get a glimpse of the ‘sexy’ new cenobites.

Looks like that AICNKing Conan rumor about ILM buffing up Arnold is false. FilmForce has an insider that claims Arnold never looked better and that the rumor is completely untrue. The devil’s in the details, you know.

The diminutive spies will be returning for a third romp! Look for Spy Kids 3 in theaters around 7/23/03 according to Coming Soon. Man! Some of these projects just zoom right through here! There’s hardly even a chance for a good raking over!

More on Aliens vs. Predator from AICN! It looks like producer John Davis is looking at a plot involving a wealthy man who uses Predator technology to extend his life. He set’s up a bunch of Alien eggs to create a hostile Hunt environment to attract the Predators so that he can study more of their technology. Hmm. Its Aliens meets Predator meets Jurassic Park! We’ll keep one horn cocked for any more info...

Here’s some good news! Freddie Prinze, Jr. and Sarah Michelle Gellar both say they want to do a sequel to the soon-to-be-inflicted-upon-us,Scooby Doo. There’s just no stopping a really stupid idea when it takes off!

TV and TV Adaption Hell:

Beware! Warner Brothers looks set to make a live-action adaption of the old Hanna-Barbera cartoon, Wonder Twins.

Run-Away Powers, Activate! ~Lee