Ok, so Jar Jar Binks sounds like one of the Teletubbies' long lost junkyard friends, and Elan Sleazebaggano is just lazy writing on George Lucas' part. But a new Star Wars alien being introduced in this May's Solo may have just won the prize for dumbest Star Wars name yet. And that's no small feat.
In Elan Sleazebaggano's defense, the death stick dealer from Coruscant is actually named Elan Sel'Sabagno and Sleazebaggano is just a nickname. Most fans were okay with Jar Jar before The Phantom Menace took a big dump on a lot of childhood memories. But this new guy? This is almost unforgivable. Until you realize what Ron Howard and his team are doing. Then you're like, yeah, okay, maybe. But dang, this is still pretty stupid.
Yes, let us introduce you to Therm Scissorpunch. This new alien was introduced as part of Denny's new Solo tie-in campaign that was launched this week, which includes new Denny's food items on the menu. One look at the guy, and you might think Denny's is trying to tempt you into trying one of their Lobster omelettes. In actuality, this 'gender neutral' alien is actually more akin to a crawdad than he is a lobster. It has big fat pincher claws, and that's obviously where It gets his name from. It's a pretty big fat dumb lazy name for a new Star Wars movie. And it's being called out across social media, as the poor thing is met with boos and hisses.
But wait, stop the noise. Some newer fans might not see what the deal is. This is actually kind of cool because the name is a throwback to the original 1977 Star Wars movie A New Hope. When George Lucas launched his epic sci-fi adventure that would change the world of cinema as we know it, he did not bother to name many of the aliens introduced in the movie. Especially those hiding inside the cantina. When it came time for the toys to be released, Kenner just threw a bunch of goofy names out to sell the action figures to kids.
That's how we wound up with Hammerhead, Walrus Man and Snaggletooth. These characters were all later given proper alien names in the official Star Wars canon. Hammerhead became Momaw Nadon, Snaggletooth became known as Zutton and Walrus Man, they call him Ponda Baba across 9 systems. So you better watch yourself.
The more recent Star Wars movies have completely bailed on giving their aliens nicknames. So no matter how dumb the name Scissorpunch may be, this is kind of a cool old school throwback to the 70s. And of course, Ron Howard is responsible. Another new alien unveiled yesterday is named Six Eyes, cause, you guessed it, he has Six Eyes. His real name is Argus Panox, though. Perhaps it's the young Han who is dolling these names out?
Therm Scissorpunch was unveiled in a new Denny's commercial launched yesterday. Though he sounds like someone who's ready to climb into a galactic boxing ring, we get to see him either making or eating a big bowl of pasta. It's hard to tell which. He probably doesn't have a big role in the movie, and some might find him to be delicious looking. Which is part of the ruse. As this is Denny's after all. You can collect Therm as part of the new trading card set from Topps exclusive only to Denny's. Here's what the nationwide chain had to say in their press release.
"Thanks to Denny's, America won't have to travel to a galaxy far, far away to experience its own taste of "Solo: A Star Wars Story." Starting today, Star Wars fans and guests across the country will be able to get their hands on a variety of movie-inspired items, including a bold new menu and exclusive Solo: A Star Wars Story trading cards only available at Denny's, all while helping a great cause in the process. Net proceeds from the sale of all trading card packs will benefit Denny's longtime partner, No Kid Hungry, to help kick childhood hunger into outer space."
Each exclusive Solo: A Star Wars Story trading card pack, which is only available at Denny's in-store and via 'Denny's on Demand', includes two of 12 different character cards, featuring Han Solo, Chewbacca, Qi'ra, Lando Calrissian and more, in addition to a Denny's coupon for future use. A portion of all sales from the $3 trading card packs, with a minimum guaranteed donation of $1million, will be donated to No Kid Hungry to help provide meals to children in need. With two cards per pack, and 12 cards all together, odds are you may end up donating quite a lot of money to a worthy cause before you ever get your hands on one of those sure to be cutthroat collectable Therm cards.
To kick off the promotional campaign, Denny's released its own Solo: A Star Wars Story inspired national TV spot call Hand of Sabacc. Set inside the lodge from Solo: A Star Wars Story, the spot features two young adversaries, who imagine that they are squared off in a high-stakes card game as characters from the Star Wars universe, including Chewbacca, watch from around the booth. Denny's worked closely with Lucasfilm and Skywalker Sound and enlisted the help of acclaimed production designer Neil Lamont and Oscar-winning creature and Special Makeup Effects Supervisor Neal Scanlan, both of whom worked on Star Wars films Rogue One and The Force Awakens, to create an authentic Star Wars environment for the spot.
Star Wars fans can also fuel up with their crew with Denny's movie-inspired menu, featuring bold new items that will send guests' taste buds into hyperdrive. Available 24/7, Denny's new menu includes the Co-Reactor Pancakes, featuring fresh strawberries, strawberry sauce and whipped cream, plus a side of Crystal Crunch Rocks and a pitcher of warm citrus sauce to pour over the pancakes; the Blaster Fire Burger, which offers up chipotle gouda cheese, bacon and spicy Ghost Pepper sauce top a hand-pressed 100 percent beef patty; along with the new Two Moons Skillet and Denny's Lightspeed Slam. Guests can also activate their taste buds by adding a side of Crystal Crunch rocks to their favorite Milk Shake.
If that wasn't enough, guests can also enjoy their favorite beverage in one of Denny's Limited Edition Solo: A Star Wars Story collector cups featuring characters from the film and topped with a Millennium Falcon lid. Fans will be able to experience Denny's promotional campaign with Solo: A Star Wars Story through June 26. You can check ol' Therm Scissorpunch out in the Denny's video and cards here.