Those dreading that Porgs might be the next Ewoks, or even worse, Jar Jar Binks, have something new to worry about this morning. With just weeks left to go before Star Wars: The Last Jedi is in theaters for all to see, we get a brief sixteen seconds of mostly new footage. And it's jokes galore. The biggest one having to do with a flying Porg.
Even before it's release, fans have worried that The Last Jedi was going to be too dark. It will show Rey struggle to transition to the Dark side, while Luke is a grumpy old hermit not unlike Yoda the first time we met him in Empire Strikes Back. There are some heavy themes in Star Wars 8, some of which may be too overwhelming for young kids. But fret not, those who like their Star Wars on the light side of the force. There will still be some laughs.
But that might be a problem. This new TV spot shows a flying Porg. But it's not flying in the way you think. Disney is playing it smart with The Last Jedi. The movie is two and a half hours long. So far, we've seen roughly six minutes of it, if that. Which means We still haven't seen two hours and twenty-four minutes of the movie. Chew on that for a second. A lot can happen in two hours and twenty-four minutes.
Disney is taking scenes from previous trailers, and just giving us a few more seconds each time. In the case of Chewbacca's new Porg friend, we first saw it screaming alongside the Wookie in the cockpit of the Millennium Falcon, when the second trailer arrived. A later TV spot showed Chewbacca becoming annoyed with the bird like creature from Ahch-To, punching it off the dash. Cute. Now we get our first full-blown Porg joke, and it looks like something straight out of Phantom Menace. Jar Jar Binks would be so proud.
Here, we see the Millennium Falcon hit light-speed, and it sends the Porg sailing through the air, where he slams into the cockpit window of the iconic ship. It plays out like a Looney Tunes joke, and might be one of the broadest moments we've seen in one of the new Star Wars movies.
The Porg was controversial before. Now wait until the haters get a load of this. It's like getting a bird doo dropped on your shoulder while strolling through the park. Speaking of which, ten dollar bet we see one of these flying jaws-mouthed otters take an in-flight dump on one of our heroes' ponchos. My guess is that it happens to Rey as she sits in the rain and pouts over Luke's aggressive and dismissive Jedi training style. I can see it now. She is disappointed. She hangs her head. She feels something on her shoulder. She looks to see a drippy Porg dropping sliding off her Jedi cloak in the wet night sky. And in her Rey voices, she frowns. 'Great.'
Come on, tell me that's not a possibility? Anyway, this new TV spot is short and sweet, but it also gives us more of Poe Dameron and BB-8 in a second scene we've been watching slowly come together over the course of various trailers and TV spots. You can take a look at the footage in question below. This equates to exactly 16 seconds of movie. So lets hope the other two hours, twenty nine minutes, and 44 seconds can refrain from too many Saturday morning cartoon jokes that wouldn't even show up in Disney XD's Star Wars Rebels. Take a look thanks to HiDef Leaks.