We all think that Batman fights to protect the innocent and the downtrodden, but does he really? And does that make him a Democrat or a Republican?
I have concluded that he is a Republican and I recommend that Mr. Wayne be charged with hate crimes. Consider the following facts:
Batman's victims are usually unemployed and forced into a life of crime to survive. Mr. Wayne never had to work a day in his life and yet his victims would do anything for a good paying job and a second chance. We found that most of his attacks were on minorities with 65% falling on African-Americans. Does a man in a hood imposing justice on Blacks, sound familiar?
Batman is the Conservative Caped Crusader. He is the GOP ideal of a man pushed too far by taxes; a man sick of supporting the poor; a man who wants to feel their bloody teeth in his fist.
Batman also attacks the mentally ill. Two-Face can't help that he's Bi-polar. Yet, Batman, continually uses violence against those who escape from Arkham Asylum.
W.E. has outsourced our Superheroes to India. Superman-protecting the Taj Mahal. Wonder Woman-protecting the chastity of their women. Wonder Twins-in the form of Elephant God and Sacred Waters.
Yes Batman has a utility belt with fantastic weapons. Too bad he sold their blueprints to Communist China. Expect cheap Nerve Toxin on Wal-Mart's shelves this Christmas.
Fuck the Hummer, do you know how much gas the Batmobile uses per hour?
All these charges are now being handed to a Grand Jury. May Judge Joker seek justice.
Dont't forget to also check out: The Dark Knight