Let The Flames Begin!

Welcome back to Dev-Hell!  As you can see, we've got a brand new, kick-ass logo, courtesy of Brian!  What do ya’ll think? Speaking of Brian, he's been busting his butt getting a new message board set up.  It's packed with very cool features, nifty emoticons and tons of room for many, many posts.  So come on over and tell us what you think!  Really, we want to know!  We'e begging for punishment here!  How can you pass up this opportunity? Here's the link to the top level of the message board; and here's a link to a Dev-Hell-opment thread You're not chicken, are you?

Columbia Pictures is quietly developing Sinbad with director John Singleton rumored to be attached. Variety mentioned that Tedi Sarafian, the writer for T3, penned the script.  Sinbad will, of course, be taking on an unstoppable, but cute, female nemesis.  Ok, I just made that up.

I normally wouldn't mention something like this here, but James Bond himself, actor Pierce Brosnan, has committed to starring and producing Laws Of Attraction, a romantic comedy shooting this fall.  He'll play a divorce lawyer that marries one of his own kind, only to find they suffer the same marital difficulties as their clients.  Sounds like a laugh riot!  It's Jaws meets Jaws! I think I need a hug...

Dark Horizons has more semi-James Bond related news.  Upcoming Bond Girl Halle Berry is in negotiations to star in Need, a thriller about a shrink who discovers her husband is sleeping with one of her patients.  Coupled with J. Lo's upcoming flick, it looks like were in for a summer of blockbuster psychiatric flicks.  Unless blockbuster psychiatric flick is an oxymoron.  Yep, I’m pretty sure it is.

Fun with endangered species!  Coming Soon has the report about a Dreamworks animated project about a kung fu fighting panda bear.  Master P: Kung Fu Panda is about a jungle invaded by (yet another endangered species) snow leopards. The jungle animals must find the prophesied warrior to defend them.  And, of course, the hero turns out to be a lazy panda that must be trained in Kung Fu.  Frankly, I can't tell if this is a good idea or a really, really bad one.  I just hope the demonic hoard down here will torture them into changing that name!

Britney Spears is set to grace the silver screen once again.  She plans on staring in a movie about US Nascar racing. The untitled movie is inspired by one of Britney's favorite movies, Days Of Thunder.’  Doesn’t that tell you a lot about Britney’s ability to judge movies?  From the looks of it, poor Britney’s going to spend a lot of time in Dev-Hell.  Not that we mind!

Comic Adaption Hell:

Oddly, I couldn’t find a single new comic adaption bit this week!  Amazing!  I think they’ve finally optioned every dang one of them.  Maybe they can move on the live action adaptions of single pane comic strips, like The Far Side.  I hope I didn't just give them an idea...

Remake Hell:

Director John Woo told Sci-Fi Channel that he’s going with CGI, rather than animatronic puppets, for the new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie.  Kawabunga, Dude!  We’re cautiously optimistic down here, but we’ve still got a few pokers on the fire.

Garth over at Dark Horizons is crying in a corner, and I don't blame him.  Variety has a piece about Warner Brothers hiring writers John Glenn (not the that John Glenn!) and Travis Wright to pen a remake of Clash of the Titans. The story will focus exclusively on Perseus taking on Medusa. Who will, no doubt, be cute and clad in a tight, leather outfit.  Sigh.  The demons have got their work cut out for them here!

Tom Selleck, Willem Dafoe and Isabella Rosselini will be staring in a remake of the Jack Palance western, Monte Walsh.  As I said last week, Westerns are the upcoming thing for the completely unoriginal executives in Hollywood.  Let's anonymously send them all one of those Hellraiser boxes!

Sequel Hell:

Back problems have caused John Frankenheimer to leave the Exorcist Prequel project.  Morgan Creek is in panic to find a new director before the September filming date.  Looks like one of the imps got a little carried away with the cat-o-nine-tails.  Good for him!

Thanks to Variety, we've been warned that Bernie Mac will be taking on the Bill Murray role of Bosley in the Charlie's Angels II: HALO.  Is this thing officially a slow motion train-wreck now?

Shooting on The Chronicles of Riddick: Pitch Black 2, has been pushed back from August to October.  No word on the reason, but we can hope they're trying to make their schedule conflict with Ja Rule's so he’ll drop out of the film.

More shooting news!  Tomb Raider 2 is apparently scheduled to starting filming sometime in August, putting it on track for a summer 2003 release.  A (very) rumored title is Cradle of Life.  Something about that title really bothers me...

TV and TV Adaption Hell:

Ok, here’s a little bit about one of the projects that managed to escape Dev-Hell.  One we should have never, ever let out.  Humor columnist Andy Borowitz has a fake news release that you're sure to enjoy: CHENEY: SCOOBY-DOO FILM IS ‘INEVITABLE’

 

As Scooby would say:  Rah, Roh!   See ya! ~Lee

Brian B. at Movieweb
Brian B.